Common Sense



Yahjekwu Greg is a life coach and he wrote an article giving advice on marriage. He encouraged husbands and wives to think about different things that they not only ought to think about but they need to act on them too so they will be happier, enjoy their marriage, and stay in love with their spouse.

I was very interested in this article and found the information quite useful. I was married 30 years to my late husband and while our marriage wasn’t perfect, we did ok with all the ups and downs that life throws at us. Items of advice included appreciating the little things that your spouse does for you every day, they are sure to build up your marriage.

Sometimes when arguments arise and you both may be angry with one another, I know for a fact that appreciation for the little things your spouse does for you each day will bring you back to thinking about them and not yourself. It will soften the anger you feel toward them and set the right tone to do some serious talking with each other. This really takes some ability to see beyond the anger, and I am today remembering that I sometimes did feel the right way about him. He was still my spouse. Really think about your spouse and maybe just little things they do are things that you can count on. Such as, do they come right home from work? Do they tell you they love you every day? Do they compliment you on something? If you think about these types of things, I’m sure that you can come up with something.

Along that line is the advice to say that you enjoy the little things in your marriage. The safety you may feel because you are married, always having together time, discussions before decisions are made, family time, couple time. Those are some of the things I enjoyed in marriage. Being able to depend on your spouse is a big plus. You know they are there for you and always will be. When the marriage is not in an exciting or critical time just remember another thing that will strengthen your marriage is being glad your spouse is a part of your life and being thankful that you have found each other.

I think of the term, “Each other” differently now. He or she found you as well as you found him or her. In fact, that term makes you think of a two-way street rather than a one-way street. For me, it opened up a new way of looking at togetherness. The faster you can get this attitude before the marriage, the sooner you will have each other’s backs.

He is probably very lucky Sometimes you have to think of these things and remind yourself why you fell in love and married them. Things like these positive thoughts will make you again feel satisfied in your marriage. Remembering why you fell in love will remind you that you really do still love them.

Respecting your mate will always work in your favor, supporting their decisions, and if you respect your partner, you will try to learn to listen to them before speaking in anger. I am working on doing that and it is slow, but I do see that relationships always go better, no one’s feelings get hurt, and no one gets angry back at you.

What about laughing together. This was another piece of advice that he gave. Laughing together is wonderful and it lifts your spirit and theirs too. It clears the air and it makes everyone relaxed and feels closer together. Have you ever been with others and looked at each other and began to laugh a little? It’s private why you are laughing, but you both know what the joke is.

I believe that YahJekwu Greg was trying to get a point across that it is imperative to consciously work on your marriage, you have to forgive each other too. Besides these things, I noticed that there were things in his article that had to be a decision that you make and need to commit to. How about deciding to love your mate each day? Decide that every day you are going to work on strengthening your relationship. Decide that you are going to look at the positives in your relationship, and definitely decide that you are loyal and fully devoted to your mate. One will never go wrong when following those suggestions.

Remember that your mate needs to be alone sometimes to pursue hobbies, friendships, and family. Yes, you are part of that circle but just sometimes they need time to themselves just like you do. It’s better to allow them to have a little space before they come to you and tell you they need a little space which usually means a lot of space. This allows them to be themselves and have some room to grow. Marriage takes work, no one marries and rides off into the sunset and lives happily ever after, that just isn’t what happens in real life.

He probably mentioned a few more, but I cannot think of them right now. He calls them mantras; I call that advice good common sense. When you follow the advice, you will have a strong and happy marriage. Happy marriage to all those who follow this good common sense. Even when your relationship is good and you’re happy, following these suggestions will make it happier and keep it always strong.


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